Worry vs Trust
Video Notes
Worry reacts to the POSSIBILITY of danger, rather than the PROBABILITY of danger.
In psychology we call it “hypervigilance.” Not that vigilance is completely unnecessary. We need to be on guard. There are dangers in this world.
But worry reacts to the possibility of danger, and the possibility of danger is almost unlimited.
The problem is that hypervigilance (worry) does NOT achieve the protection that one hopes it will achieve.
It is a known fact among abuse counseling (counseling victims of abuse) that those who have been abused, those who have been victimized, are often Re-Victimized, and we think the reason for this is that they are hypervigilant. They are so afraid of everything that their nervous systems are literally worn out and they miss the actual threat, and they are not able to defend themselves appropriately.
In psychology we call it “hypervigilance.” Not that vigilance is completely unnecessary. We need to be on guard. There are dangers in this world.
But worry reacts to the possibility of danger, and the possibility of danger is almost unlimited.
The problem is that hypervigilance (worry) does NOT achieve the protection that one hopes it will achieve.
It is a known fact among abuse counseling (counseling victims of abuse) that those who have been abused, those who have been victimized, are often Re-Victimized, and we think the reason for this is that they are hypervigilant. They are so afraid of everything that their nervous systems are literally worn out and they miss the actual threat, and they are not able to defend themselves appropriately.
Worry is blind and cannot discern the future. -- EGW, Ministry of Healing, page 481
We worry because we hope that it is going to help us predict any kind of potential threat out there, but it really doesn’t work that way at all. It doesn’t discern the future. It is blind.
So, for no other reason, just reject this unhealthy and dangerous habit of worry, because it is not going to achieve what you think it is going to achieve. (Worry is counter-productive. It is actually a self-fulfilling prophecy of doom.)
The replacement for worry is: TRUST.
Trust may sound like a very dangerous proposition, especially for those whose trust has been horribly violated. But it is worse for you to never trust or to distrust and worry, than it is for you to trust -- just learn to trust intelligently.
All institutions, all social entities -- a family or a church or even society -- function on the basis of trust. When trust falls away from a given society, that society makes a cultural descent.
A society cannot prosper when there is no trust among the members of that society. The same is true of small societies like families and friendships.
Trust provides a foundation for healthy functioning in relationships and for the healthy functioning of each individual.
There is a neuro-chemical in your brain called oxytocin, which is the mediator for trust. It is the thing that is working in your brain when you are forming a trust bond.
Research has shown that injecting oxytocin increases the willingness to take social risks. Oxytocin allows you to talk to strangers and form new friendships.
Loneliness decreases as trust beliefs and trusting behavior increases.
Trust is worth the risk – even though trust brings in some risk factors, the fact is that there is no such thing as trust without risk.
If you do away with risk, you do away with the need to trust.
Even though there is a risk involved in trusting, it is worth the risk, particularly if you learn how to choose your friends and confidants well, and how to conduct your life in an intelligent manner.
What you will find is that you will be disappointed in other people less and less, and those trust bonds will build, and that trust itself will help form the foundation for healthy functioning in yourself and in your relationships.
So, for no other reason, just reject this unhealthy and dangerous habit of worry, because it is not going to achieve what you think it is going to achieve. (Worry is counter-productive. It is actually a self-fulfilling prophecy of doom.)
The replacement for worry is: TRUST.
Trust may sound like a very dangerous proposition, especially for those whose trust has been horribly violated. But it is worse for you to never trust or to distrust and worry, than it is for you to trust -- just learn to trust intelligently.
All institutions, all social entities -- a family or a church or even society -- function on the basis of trust. When trust falls away from a given society, that society makes a cultural descent.
A society cannot prosper when there is no trust among the members of that society. The same is true of small societies like families and friendships.
Trust provides a foundation for healthy functioning in relationships and for the healthy functioning of each individual.
There is a neuro-chemical in your brain called oxytocin, which is the mediator for trust. It is the thing that is working in your brain when you are forming a trust bond.
Research has shown that injecting oxytocin increases the willingness to take social risks. Oxytocin allows you to talk to strangers and form new friendships.
Loneliness decreases as trust beliefs and trusting behavior increases.
Trust is worth the risk – even though trust brings in some risk factors, the fact is that there is no such thing as trust without risk.
If you do away with risk, you do away with the need to trust.
Even though there is a risk involved in trusting, it is worth the risk, particularly if you learn how to choose your friends and confidants well, and how to conduct your life in an intelligent manner.
What you will find is that you will be disappointed in other people less and less, and those trust bonds will build, and that trust itself will help form the foundation for healthy functioning in yourself and in your relationships.
Notes & Worksheet
Use the "Back Arrow" to return to your Previous Page.